The saying is that prayer changes things.... though, really, prayer changes me.
When I pray, I learn humility because I am so needy, so incomplete. I learn reliance on God to do things I cannot do. I learn patience as I wait for Him to move on my behalf. Prayer changes me.... which is good because I have learned that creating haven in my marriage requires a lot of change on my part.
I've been thinking a lot lately about praying for my husband. It's something I would like to do a better job of; be more purposeful about. Pray for your husband may seem like a simple statement, but I have been profoundly challenged as I have unpacked and pondered these few, simple words.
You've probably seen the saying, "Have you prayed about it as much as you have talked about it?" That's more than a nice sentiment. And no where is it more true than in our marriages. As tempting as it is to fret about my husband's flaws, have mental conversations with him, hound him (subtle hints, cool manipulation, downright nagging - pick your poison), or complain about him to a friend, none of those things has effectively create haven in my marriage relationship. And none of them has - or will ever - effect lasting change in my husband.
Let's face it, our husbands are not perfect. Which is good because if they were they probably wouldn't want to put up with all of our imperfections as wives. We all have areas that we need to change. Yet only One has the power to change hearts. And it's not us, wives!
I have found over the course of my marriage that change in my husband has never resulted from my talking. The times when my husband has experienced growth & change in some area of his life have been times when I have stopped